If motherhood has swallowed your identity… this is for you


There’s something almost every mom says to me at some point quietly, like it’s a confession:

“I don’t really know who I am anymore.”

Not in a dramatic, crisis-level way.
More like a slow fade.
A dimming.
A quiet losing track of the things that once made you feel grounded and confident and… like yourself.

Motherhood shifts your identity in ways you can’t fully prepare for.
Research has shown this over and over (Nelson et al., 2014): becoming “Mom” doesn’t just add a role. It reshapes how the world sees you, how your partner sees you, and how you start to see yourself.

And if you're honest, maybe you’ve felt that shift in ways you can’t always quite articulate:

•You hesitate before answering, “What do you do for fun?”
•You say “I’m fine” when you mean “I’m drowning.”
•You shoulder the mental load because “it’s just easier.”
•You get irritated at your partner for things you can't even put words to.
•You forget the last time you made a decision purely for you.

None of that means you’re failing.
It means you’ve been surviving on autopilot.

And autopilot gets things done… but it slowly erases the parts of you that make life feel like your life.


Why this matters (and why it feels so hard)

Your brain is constantly scanning for threats, needs, and responsibilities.
It’s part biology, part societal conditioning, part mental load.

Daminger’s research in 2019 found that women hold the majority of the cognitive labor in families — not just doing tasks but anticipating, planning, predicting, remembering. (But like, duh, we already knew that, right?)

So if you feel fried, foggy, overstimulated, or disconnected from yourself?
Your nervous system is telling the truth.

You were never meant to carry all of that without support, without space, and without a chance to reconnect with yourself outside the roles you carry.


This is why I created Confident Mom Reset.

Because moms aren’t “overreacting.”
They’re overwhelmed.
They’re depleted.
They’re expected to make a whole identity shift without any guidance or support.

Week 1 of the Reset is all about helping you reconnect with you.
Not the mom version.
Not the partner version.
Not the responsible-one-who-remembers-everything version.

Just you.

We talk about:
– why you feel invisible (and how to change that)
– the honest grief of losing parts of yourself
– how the mental load is silencing your confidence
– the difference between self-sacrifice and self-leadership
– micro-practices that actually rebuild self-trust

And yes, we coach through real-life moments — the guilt, the irritability, the “I should be able to handle this” spiral, the sense of missing yourself.


If you’re craving clarity, confidence, and a sense of YOU again… the door is open.

The first group session is free.
Come see if this space feels grounding.
Come see what it’s like to be in a room where you don’t need to pretend you’re fine.
Come see what shifts when someone finally asks, “But what do you need right now?”

If it resonates, you can stay for the remaining weeks.
If not, you’ll still walk away with tools that make this season lighter.

Save your spot by registering here → Confident Mom Reset (First call free)


It’s okay if this season has stretched you thin.
It’s okay if you’ve forgotten pieces of yourself.
It’s okay if you want to feel like you again.

That desire doesn’t make you selfish, it makes you a full ass human.

And you don’t have to find your way back alone. Doing this work wil lbe a great gift to you and to everyone who is around you.

Rooting for you,
Chels

P.S. If your partner is also struggling (or if you’re carrying the emotional weight for both of you), remember that Dad Group is running this round too — and the first call is free for him as well. Sometimes the biggest change comes when both of you get space to breathe and recalibrate.

Postpartum Together with Chelsea Skaggs

I help expecting and new parents improve their communication skills, connection points, and confidence through relationship road mapping so they can enjoy the life they've built together.

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