I help expecting and new parents improve their communication skills, connection points, and confidence through relationship road mapping so they can enjoy the life they've built together.
The things our kids will think are normal
|
This morning, the day after an election, I keep coming back to our kids, Reader. I wonder what they’ll notice when they’re older. Will they remember Mom having friends she made time for? Things she was excited about that had nothing to do with them? Will they remember Dad knowing what needed to happen without someone leaving him a list? Will they grow up assuming both people get to have needs? I think about how early we learn those things. Long before we have words like “mental load,” we’ve watched who gets up when someone needs something. Who stays seated. Who knows where everything is. Who asks. And then we become adults who love each other and want a family, and all that old learning comes along with us. Often without an invitation. I’ve had to look at my own part in that, too. The times I’ve said “I’ve got it” when I absolutely did not have it. The resentment that followed. The uncomfortable practice of saying what I need before I’m so overwhelmed that it comes out sideways. Mike and I are still learning. Our kids get to see that part, too. There’s something hopeful about that for me. They don’t need us to have entered parenthood knowing everything. It’s also the hope underneath Prep for Us. I imagine a couple sitting together before their baby arrives, discovering that they’ve pictured two very different versions of parental leave. Having a slightly awkward conversation now that makes it easier to say, “This isn’t working for me,” later. I think those conversations can change a family’s direction. So today, I’m letting myself feel hopeful about the people willing to have them. About what we can learn, what we can stop passing down, and what our kids might someday consider completely normal. What’s one thing you hope your kids grow up expecting from partnership? I’d love to hear it. Chels |
Postpartum Together with Chelsea Skaggs
I help expecting and new parents improve their communication skills, connection points, and confidence through relationship road mapping so they can enjoy the life they've built together.
Hey friend, I had meltdowns this weekend. Plural. The overwhelm piled up, and I hit my limit. I needed my husband. I needed a friend. And this morning, I needed to sit with my feelings before opening my laptop and pretending a fresh to-do list would magically sort me out. It's annoying that feelings don’t respect office hours. I’m sharing because whether you’re pregnant or deep in postpartum, I want you to hear this: Having a hard time doesn’t mean you’re doing a bad job. And knowing all the...
Hey Reader, One couple I worked with had a pattern that might sound familiar: She planned. He executed. He was willing to do things. But she was still the one noticing what needed to happen, thinking ahead, and remembering the details. We talked about something as ordinary as leaving the house with their baby. Who notices the diaper bag needs restocking? Who checks what’s missing? Who makes sure it’s ready for the next outing? Packing the bag when someone asks is one task. Taking...
Hey friend,A few months ago I met Zawwar and was automatically astounded about how much he knows about the ins and outs of prenatal vitamins. I mean, it makes sense... he did create his own option after realizing that women do NOT want to suffer through huge pills and labels that they can't understand. I learned things in this episode that no one taught me through 2 pregnancies and I'm happy to pass this quick episode over to you. If you're currently TTC or expecting, this is especially for...